{"product_id":"your-inner-8-year-old™-now-with-revenge-15-000-retro-games","title":"YOUR INNER 8-YEAR-OLD™ - NOW WITH REVENGE (15,000+ RETRO GAMES)","description":"\u003cp data-start=\"104\" data-end=\"212\"\u003eRemember when you were absolute garbage at games… and everyone knew it?\u003cbr data-start=\"175\" data-end=\"178\"\u003eYeah. This is your redemption arc.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"214\" data-end=\"634\"\u003eThis little monster comes loaded with \u003cstrong data-start=\"252\" data-end=\"269\"\u003e15,000+ games\u003c\/strong\u003e, which basically means you now have zero excuses left. You either finally beat those childhood demons… or confirm you were always trash. Either way — respect.\u003cbr data-start=\"428\" data-end=\"431\"\u003eAnd with a \u003cstrong data-start=\"442\" data-end=\"461\"\u003e3200mAh battery\u003c\/strong\u003e, you’ve got up to \u003cstrong data-start=\"480\" data-end=\"491\"\u003e6 hours\u003c\/strong\u003e of straight gameplay. That’s enough time for your eyes to dry out, your responsibilities to collapse, and your inner child to fully take over.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"636\" data-end=\"689\"\u003eThis isn’t just a console — it’s unfinished business.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"691\" data-end=\"726\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"691\" data-end=\"726\"\u003eThis console is for people who:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"727\" data-end=\"1016\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-section-id=\"7x41m1\" data-start=\"727\" data-end=\"783\"\u003egot bullied by video games as a kid and never healed\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-section-id=\"1ixytlp\" data-start=\"784\" data-end=\"831\"\u003ewant revenge on pixelated enemies from 2004\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-section-id=\"1j7ola\" data-start=\"832\" data-end=\"882\"\u003esay “just one more game” and suddenly it’s 3AM\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-section-id=\"10jzklf\" data-start=\"883\" data-end=\"956\"\u003ewanna prove to their kid they were never actually that bad (you were)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-section-id=\"7jk7g3\" data-start=\"957\" data-end=\"1016\"\u003emiss when games were simple… but still ruined your life\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"DSers","offers":[{"title":"white - 128GB","offer_id":53366139060408,"sku":"14:175#white-128G-1","price":95.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"white - 64GB","offer_id":53366139257016,"sku":"14:350853#white-64G-1","price":75.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"black - 128GB","offer_id":53366139519160,"sku":"14:691#black-128G-1","price":95.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"black - 64GB","offer_id":53366139289784,"sku":"14:29#black-64G-1","price":75.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"yellow - 128GB","offer_id":53366139355320,"sku":"14:838766145#yellow-128G-1","price":95.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"yellow - 64GB","offer_id":53366139453624,"sku":"14:201456607#yellow-64G-1","price":75.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"red - 128GB","offer_id":53366139584696,"sku":"14:365462#bright red-128G","price":95.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"red - 64GB","offer_id":53366139617464,"sku":"14:1044182028#bright red-64G","price":75.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0947\/2740\/5752\/files\/wvu8jgelzsruy7t1aytf.webp?v=1776821791","url":"https:\/\/shitforfriends.com\/products\/your-inner-8-year-old%e2%84%a2-now-with-revenge-15-000-retro-games","provider":"SHIT FOR FRIENDS","version":"1.0","type":"link"}